'Carnivalia's Asylum for Haunted Objects and Wayward Ghosts' a place to send your possessed ouija boards and other cursed objects, where we will preserve then and minister to the ghosts attached to them. Also featuring a collection of stupid ghost jokes. Keywords: ghosts, spirits, ouija, talkingboards, haunted, cursed, psychic, channeling, mediums.

Here at 'Carnivalia's Asylum for Haunted Objects and Wayward Ghosts' we are dedicated to providing a safe space for all spiritually inhabited objects. If you have an object that you believe is haunted, or cursed, or simply unfetching, we seek to provide it with a good home.

If you are seeking to be rid of a haunted object(s), such as a talkingboard or doll, we ask that you contact us at
orders@carnivalia.com
and title your email 'Haunted'

We are not that picky, really, and will likely accept the following haunted objects:
--thingamajigs, doodads, gizmos, whatsits, thingumabobs, widgets, jiggers--

However, our standards prevent us from accepting possessed doohickeys,
and we would appreciate you not asking us to do so.

We will do our best to find a good home for your haunted object, and will work towards leading any spirits attached to it towards their final destination into the light.

For further details click on the banner below, or click on its twin when you have reached the bottom of this page.

For many decades, haunted objects and the ghosts attached to them have suffered undue prejudice. Ugly superstitions abound concerning how such objects should be destroyed; while ghosts and their needs are often invisible to people.

In this age of political correctness, only obese people and ghosts continue to be bear the brunt of jokes and discrimination with little outraged criticism, which is ironic when one considers how little in common the full-bodied have with the disembodied. Consider, as an example, the following 'jokes,' which serve no purpose but to demonize the wandering dead.

What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog?
He is mist.

What kind of music do ghosts listen to?
Sheet music.

What would you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman?
A dead ringer.

Not only are such jokes offensive, they amuse only the most juvenile of minds.
Here's more.

What's a ghost's favorite game?
Hide-And-Go-Shriek!

Why did the ghost cross the road?
To get to "THE OTHER SIDE"

Why did the ghost go into the bar?
For the boos.

Given the hostile climate towards spirits evident in such horrifying humor, is it any wonder that some ghosts act out? Ultimately, society bears the blame. But recognizing that does nothing to help those souls already lost. For many, all they have is an object to haunt, and often even that refuge is jeopardized.

When one realizes that an object has become possessed, the compassionate person will set a place for the ghost at the table.

Yet not everyone's heart bleeds so generously, so to be rid of unwanted poltergeists some unenlightened people seek to dispose of their haunted objects altogether.

Consider the superstitions concerning the often haunted object--the talkingboard. Some say that in order to free oneself of whatever ghost might inhabit it, the board must be burned, and its ashes scattered to the four directions. Even that act is said to come with negative consequences, killing anyone who hears the scream of the exiting ghost(s). Certainly the fumes wont do any good for the environment or anyone downwind. As artists and crafters of such boards, we at Carnivalia find the practice to be most uncivilized.

Many a wayward ghost is in need of your charity.

Here at 'Carnivalia's Home for Haunted Objects and Wayward Ghosts' we do
our best to provide shelter and aid to the ghosts we seek to save, but we need your help.

Consider how many ghosts go day to day without a head. We always have a jack-o-lantern carved and ready, to replace what the guillotine of errant machete has severed. But pumpkins don't come free, and so we need the aid of caring folk like you to help us give these ghosts a grin.

Just a one-time donation of $15.00 can make a huge difference in the afterlife of a ghost.

Due to the prejudices of government against ghosts, your donation will not be tax deductable.
However, you will receive in the mail a token of our gratitude, along with a picture and biography of the ghost you are helping.

And while you are in a giving mood, consider this:
Although it is impossible to count how many refugee ghosts abound in the ether, the faces of mortal suffering are all too real. The best way to assure that spirits have a well-adjusted afterlife is to provide for their well being before they die. So we urge you to seek out a charity that works in support of the living. Here are our suggestions.

The American Red Cross
Doctors Without Borders
The Sierra Club

In our search and study of ghosts, we must make certain that issues of human suffering and environmental deterioration are not invisible to us.

Here at 'Carnivalia's Asylum for Haunted Objects and Wayward Ghosts' we seek to free each haunted object of its agoraphobic spirit, and when possible, provide the freedom for ghosts to explore whatever issues keep them from moving on to a more productive afterlife.

To learn more about our techniques and some of the objects we have taken in, their histories, images, and what has become of their ghost(s), I refer you to the links below.

	Come see our Talkingboards. We currently offer thirteen hand-crafted styles to choose from.